Negative Nellie

I am a little disappointed, I shall admit, in hearing what I heard this morning. I suppose I should have caught it myself long ago. I suppose I should have worked on it as I grew, but I didn’t. This morning as we discussed books to possibly read this year, I had a comment on most of them because I have heard of, or read them. Suddenly from a corner of the room that I tend to avoid, I hear the comment that shut me up again- maybe for a while.
“You should be a critic. You have something negative to say about everything, but you say it intellectually so it turns out okay.” I turned slowly to the opposite direction and slipped into thought- as I often do. I felt terrible. I felt like I was incapable of saying anything positive about anything. I thought I was that giant negative Nellie that makes everybody feel bad. And I realized that I probably am.
I want to be better. I would like to learn the positive of all situations so I don’t seem like I am just walking around trying to make everyone miserable. I suppose we could call it a revelation- from hence forth I shall try my hardest to find a good, a silver lining- perhaps a copper lining, if you will- in every tiny little object, person, issue, or situation I come in contact with.
For the time being, I wouldn’t come to me with advice. The only advice I could probably give would be how much it sucks, how much it will suck, or how much it has sucked.
Come back in a week or so, then I can show you just how full your stupid glass is.

Baby Giggles

Sun In The Shade

Lost

I'm losing my mind
I lost my best friend.
Well, I lost my most comfortable aquaintence.
I wouldn't call her a friend because she never treated me like one.
From the time we were little, my companionship has been useful to her.
I can't say it upsets me to be alone.
In fact, I feel more free than I ever have.
My entire life I have lived to please someone.
I have lived to help others.
For once, I think I left this alone for me.
I need to be set free of the drama.
I can't handle another wound in my back.


When she reads this, she think of me nastily and say under her breath, 'I didn't need you anyomer any way.'
Could I answer her I would say that I never needed you. It was all out of love and comfort. Don't feel badly for me, and don't think badly of me. I just can't handle all of the stuff on my plate right now. Your 'friendship' is something I am too busy to tollerate anymore. I think you know why.
Last thing- stop talking badly of me to my friends, they have enough reasons to dislike me already.

-JDHUNT